Thursday, January 1, 2015

2014 A Reflection

All in all, 2014 made me a better person.  I learned, I struggled, I gained perspective.

I learned a lot about eternity this year through passing of loved ones, to being sealed to Corbin and also watching my best friend be sealed to her two little boys.   One of which who had already returned to our Heavenly Father.  Through all of these experiences I was taught to live with more of an eternal perspective.  I read The Message by Lance Richardson and it was seriously life changing.  I highly recommend it.

At the beginning of this year I really struggled as a mom.  I've written a post about five times now trying to describe what it was like to have a colicky baby, an aggressive child, and a husband who is always gone (not by choice).  They all sound whiny or ungrateful which is not really what I want to convey so they continue to stay drafts.  I'll work on revising them and hopefully one day I'll actually publish one.  Life is still hard, but in a different way.  We are so close to getting Emme's meds just right and Corbin is a little sweetheart.  There is not a day that goes by that I don't thank my lucky stars that he joined our family despite feeling overwhelmed at the time of his arrival.  I am still in awe at the miracle those two are to me.  I feel underserving to be their mom 95% of the time.

Survive.  You could say that was my goal for 2014.  When in survival mode you tend to delete a lot from your life.  Shopping? Nah.  Having a spotless house?  Not possible.  Date nights?  What are those?  Relationships?  Put on hold.  Organization?  Don't make me laugh.  Working out?  Stop.  Just stop.

Obviously "survive" is not the best goal, but it's all I had to work with and guess what ya'll?  Mission accomplished.

I have a lot of hope for 2015.  Gregg finishes school this Spring, I'm starting to pursue photography, and our little munchkins are healthy and happy.  I'm excited to see what this year holds.

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