We rocked many girl's camps together.
|Jess is using an actual phone with a cord and everything.|
|What else is there to do in a small town on a Saturday night, but play at the park?|
|Jess with her high school sweetheart. How cute is that?|
|Thanks, Idaho, for a miserably windy and cold graduation day.|
|Helping me carry my ginormously poofy wedding dress.|
|My favorite picture of the three of us.|
Shortly after Emme joined our family through adoption, I got a text from Jessica saying they were going to be starting the process to adopt as well. I was so excited for her, but I also knew what a roller coaster it could be and hoped her experience would go smoothly.
They had many ups and down while waiting to be chosen, and unfortunately most were down. I was heartbroken when I told her we were getting another baby. I cried and scolded Heavenly Father from denying them of being parents. It wasn't fair. Jessica took the news gracefully and told me this baby was meant to come to our family and not to worry about her.
When Corbin was a few months old I received a text from Jess with a picture of the cutest and tiniest 6 month old I had ever seen. She was finally going to be a mommy. I cried tears of joy for days afterward. I told everyone I came across the happy news. I didn't even care if they knew her or not. I thanked Heavenly Father. All seemed right in the world.
Sweet Kai had some health issues, but he immediately flourished in Jess and Spencer's home. I loved every picture and video Jess sent me. I couldn't wait to get him and Corbin together, but with Corbin being really sick all winter, it was impossible.
One short month ago another text with a picture showed up on my phone. Poor Kai was hooked up to a million tubes and Jess was kissing him on the forehead. She told me the horrible news that he was fighting for his life. It happened so sudden. One day he was doing amazing and the next he was attached to a life saving machine. My heart broke into a million pieces. It felt so surreal. I again pleaded with Heavenly Father. Please, please, please, don't let this happen.
We were headed out of town just minutes after I heard the news and I'm pretty sure I cried most of the way to our destination. Kai's fate started to look up and by night time he was doing pretty well. I went to bed feeling like he was going to be okay.
Heavenly Father had other plans for Kai. In the middle of the night he experienced a massive stroke one of which was impossible to survive. I wept and wept. Again, this wasn't fair. This can't be happening.
Gregg and I packed our bags as fast as we could and left town. For mostly selfish reasons I had to get to Jessica.
I made it to the hospital just minutes after Kai passed away. My experiences after that are hard to explain. How can you describe what it's like to hug a mother who just said goodbye to their child? I don't have the vocabulary for it.
Kai had an amazing viewing The spirit was very strong and hearts were very heavy. He looked so perfect.
There was a balloon release at the cemetery. Jess' dad joked he was going to bring a red one because he is a huge Utes fan. So funny.
This was my favorite photo of all. So much contemplation in Spencer's face.
Kai is so missed. I look up to Jessica so much. She is so strong. She knows Heavenly Father has a plan for her family. She struggles with the hurt, but I admire her want to get through each day being a little stronger. She is a true model of what a mother should be.
Jess, I hope you know you can always count on me. I will always be ready to take a trip to see the pigs when you need it. ;)